Top 100 of the best black humor jokes

In the humor category, we find black humor jokes.But do you know what it is and above all, do you know about it?

Humor one day, always humor.After giving you many examples of funny children's jokes from Toto's adventures or funny stories with melon and meleche, we invite you to discover a new series of funny jokes.For this new article, we were interested in black humor.

Who says black humor, says quotes for adults.Because yes, these jokes and quotes approach themes that are not intended for children.It is therefore not uncommon to see adults laughing for jokes from black humor.But beware, these jokes don't necessarily make everyone laugh.And for good reason, their themes and their sarcasm can disturb some of your interlocutors.You can always turn to Beauf jokes!

If you are part of this audience which is a fan of “black humor” or yellow laughing, which never take these jokes in the first degree, and that you are looking to know other stories to tell your friends, this article is madefor you.Let's start our overlap of the top 100 of the best black humor jokes found on the web without further delay in the web.

Emoji laugh on a phone.Credit: Unsplash

The funny story of black humor

First of all, do you know what really the black humor also called a yellow laugh or "dark humor" in English?It is a form of humor that allows to approach with irony and sarcasm, the absurdity of life.It is often a source of discomfort and should not be confused with simple free wickedness.The origin of this expression is allocated to André Breton and his book "Anthology of black humor" released in 1940.Today there are magazines and newspapers specializing in this kind of humor.We think in particular of Hara Kiri who accompany their quotes of black humor with images.

Black humor is much appreciated by certain celebrities, in particular the French comic world.Among the best known who made and make jokes of black humor during a show, we find: Coluche, Pierre Desproges, Laurent Baffie, Raymond Devos, Patrick Timsit, Stéphane Guillon, Jean-Luc Lemoine, Jean-François Mercier, ChantalLadesou or Blanche Gardin.But the comic world is not the only area of culture to use it.We find mainly this black humor in literature, comics, theater, drawing or even cinema.Witness the many films of the American director Quentin Tarantino, the French actor and director Albert Dupontel or the troop of humorists of the Monty Python.

The funny top 100 to laugh black humor

1.What do we call a boomerang that doesn't come back?A missing cat.

2.What does a blind man say when you give it sandpaper?"It's written very small".

3.Why does the little girl fall from the swing?Because she has no arms.

4.What is worse than a baby in a trash can?A baby in two trash cans.

5.Thanks to what can we remove the chewing gum in the hair?The cancer.

6.What is better than winning a gold medal at the Paralympic Games?Walk.

7.What part of the vegetable does not pass in the mixer?The wheelchair.

8.How do you recognize a letter sent by a leper?The tongue is glued to the stamp.

9.What to do when you find an epileptic in crisis in a bathtub?Add laundry and throw your dirty laundry.

10.How to get a baby out of a mixer?With a straw.

11.What has two legs and bleeding?Half a dog.

12.What do we recognize a crushed cat?It is a centimeter wide.

13.What is the difference between a footballer, a handballeut and a pedophile?The footballer marks the foot, the handballer marks with the hand, and the pedophile Marc Dutroux.

14.Can we take a bath when you have diarrhea?Yes if you have enough.

15.How does a blind parachutist know that he will touch the ground?There is soft in the dog leash.

16.What is the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?When my computer crashes, it drips me.

17.What is green and stinking?A scout disappeared at the bottom of a wood.

18.What is Germany's official vegetable?Michael Schumacher.

19.Why don't myopaths never drive a car?Because they never reach the age of the license.

20.What's 5 arms, 3 legs and 2 feet?Boston's marathon's finish line.

21.- Mom, mom, I don't want to sleep with my little brother anymore.

- Shut your mouth !I already told you we didn't have enough money to bury it.

22.Why does a Chinese child never believe in Santa Claus?Because it was he who made the toys.

23.- Mom, mom, dad hanging in the garden!

- April Fool !He hanged himself in the attic!

24.What is the worst combination of diseases?Alzheimer's and diarrhea.You run, but you don't know where.

25.How do Chernobyl children have up to 33?On their fingers.

26.A Jewish child in a concentration camp plays with dust.A guard approaches and says:

- Well then?Are we playing with dad and mom?

27.Two youth friends find themselves in the forties spent.One request to the other:

- Do you have children?

-I had one, she replied, tear to the eye.Then one day, he left!

- Ah?Yes I understand.Are you missing a lot, then?

- When I think of him, often I cry

.-And what are you doing, in this case, to console yourself?

- Well, I watch the video of my abortion!

28.A father to his son:

- Fiston, do you know what your sister said when she lost her virginity?

- Oh not dad ...

- Exactly !

29.Mom, why are you going back to my temperature in my mouth?You have already taken it in my behind, 10 minutes ago!

- I know my darling, but this time it's just to clean the thermometer!

30.What are Brigitte Macron's favorite cakes?Little schoolchildren.

Black humor is to be taken in the second degree - © Istock

31.My wife laughed when I told her that I still had the body of an 18 -year -old.She laughed much less when she saw it in pieces in the freezer.

32.A man is in the hospital and says to his nurse:

-You are my favorite nurse, could you come to see me when I am out of this hospital?

- Sorry I would love to come and see you, but I hate cemeteries.

33.The judge asks: you did not feel anything when you cut your wife into pieces before cooking it?

- If, at one point I even cried.

- Ah anyway ! When ?

- When I cut the onions.

34.Children ring in a lady.The lady answers them:

- What is it ?

- We would like to know if your son Titouan can play with us?

- But you know that Titouan has neither arms nor leg?

- Yes but we need a balloon.

35.In a class, a teacher asks his students:

- Who can tell me what are the best combustible materials?

A Jewish student, having the answer, raises his hand hoping to be questioned:

- I say !I say !Me Madam!Me !

- Excellent answer what else?

36.A priest enters a McDonald’s:

-Hello, I would like a children's menu if you go.

The server :

- Fries and Coca?

The priest :

- No just the child, thank you.

37.What is the common point between a necrophile and a man who bathes in Brittany?Both say: "She is cold but once in it, she is good.»»

38.A guy tells his friend:

- Here, after ten years, my ex has just resurfaced.

- Ah?Did you talk to yourself?

- Well no.It's just that the rope that connected its ankles to the concrete block dropped.

39.What is the common point between a Jew and shoes?There are more than 39 than in 45.

40.He's a little boy who says to his grandmother:

- Granny?Don't you think it smells bad here?Looks like a corpse smell?Granny?Do you hear me granny?

41.A Jew is in an elevator.Suddenly, the man next to him drops a big fart.The Jew looks at him with the shocked air.The man then said to him:

- Oh, I'm good !It's gas, it never killed anyone!

42.She is a woman who returns home completely panicked: -

Darling !The driver tried to ride me!He wanted to eliminate me!It is absolutely necessary to send it back!

- But let's see !Leave him at least a second chance!

Man who laughs.Credit: Unsplash

43.A medical examiner examines the corpse of a young woman who has just been murdered.The police officer in charge of the investigation asks him:

- Was she abused?

- Not yet, I was waiting for your authorization.

44.Why do ecologists like lepers?Because they are biodegradable.

45.A kid, perpetually worried, asks his parents:

-Was I adopted?

- Not yet.We only put the announcement yesterday.

46.In which place is an eight-year-old child capable of having 3,000 pumps in 16 hours?In a shoe factory in China.

47.What do you call a dog without legs?We don't call it we're going to look for it.

48.Two men chat in a cafe:

- I read in the newspaper that a man killed his wife the day after his wedding night.

The other then responds:

- Sometimes the night is advice.

49.What is white and falling during harsh winters?The little old people.

50.Autopsy: it allows others to discover what we have never seen in ourselves.

51.A ugly woman is the treasure of a house: it avoids many concerns.

52.catastrophies are parties for the poor.

53.Sometimes I look at some people and I tell myself that a little hood could have avoided a lot of things.

54.Where does the expression "hard to leather" come from?Do you give your tongue to the cat?It comes from the world's second-G.It was to talk about rebel Jews.

55.The difference between a part of pizza and a prostitute?Pizza, you have the choice of having mushrooms.

56.What is the common point between an African child and a flower?They need water for a week and after they die.

57.Mom, mom, can I have the candies who are in the wardrobe?

- Of course my darling, you only have to take them.

- But mom, I have no arms.

- No arms, no candy.

58.Dad, I don't like grandmother.

- Well left on the edge of the plate.

59.What is the difference between a terrorist training camp and an orphanage?

- I don't know, I just drive the drone.

60.Why do retirees love mud baths?Because they get used to the taste of the earth.

61.Papa, why short zig-zag in the garden?

- Your Fiston mouth!You can see that I try to aim just.

62.Why are there no Arabs in "Star Wars"?Because it's in the future.

63.What is the difference between a seducer and a rapist?Patience.

64.Do you know the common point between a black and a cream?It's better when it's whipped.

65.What is the difference between E.T the extraterrestrial and an Arab?E.T understood that we had to go home.

66.What does a bird say when he flies over the Auschwitz concentration camp?Cooked, cooked, cooked.

67.Mom, mom, everyone at school tells me that I have long teeth.

- But no.Raise your head, you will scratch the floor.

68.Why is it recommended to put sparadrap around hamsters?So that they do not explode when they are sodomized.

69.A sadistic, a masochist, a serial killer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are seated on a bench in a park and is bored.Suddenly, the zoophile says:

- Come and catch a cat.

The sadist says:

- Come and catch a cat et après on le torture.

The serial killer says:

- Come and catch a cat, on le torture, et après on le tue.

The necrophile says:

- Come and catch a cat, on le torture, on le tue et après on le baise.

The pyromaniac says:

- Come and catch a cat, on le torture, on le tue, on le baise et après on le brûle.

The masochist says:

- Miaou.

70.Do you know how to recognize a woman when she is going to say something intelligent?His sentence as always by "my husband told me that".

71.A worried man sees his girlfriend pack his bags.This one asks him:

- Can I know where you plan to go?

- I'm leaving you.

- Are you leaving me?And I can know why?

- Because you are a pedophile.

- But how can you know a word like 8 years old?

72.A little boy before going to sleep tells his mom:

- Mom, why do we live in Hiroshima?

- Farm your 3 eyes and sleep.

73.A priest enters a MC Donald:

-Hello, I would like a children's menu if it is you.

The server :

- Fries and Coca?

The priest :

- No just the child, thank you.

74.The judge to a guy condemned for killing his father and mother:

- What do you have to say for your defense?

The accused:

- You are not going to condemn a poor orphan?

75.Prince Charles said to the Queen:

- You know mom, Diana is far too talkative.

The queen said to him:

- Be patient my son, she will end up crashing.

76.What do we call courage?Accept that a cannibal makes you a pipe.

77.How do you know when a leper must leave part of poker?It is when he loses his hand.

78.Mummy mummy !Why is daddy so pale?

- Shut up and keep digging.

79.How to make a woman yell twice?By fucked it and then wiping in the curtains.

80.We finally found a way to operate without anesthesia.The surgeon puts Quiès balls.

Black humor can sometimes create discomfort - © Istock

The world of culture and its stories with black humor:

- The humorist Pierre Desproges:

81.If it is the best who leave the first, what then to think of early ejaculators?

82.Among this list of words, look for intruder: metastasis, schwartzenberg, chemotherapy, future.

- The humorist Laurent Baffie:

83.Halloween: home delivery for pedophiles.

- The humorist Coluche:

84.The rise in oil leads to concerns among the disabled people.

- The world of comedy:

85.It's very relaxing to be deaf.We only tell you the essential.(Sacha Guitry)

86.Do you like your mother?So take a bit.(Pierre Doris)

- singer Serge Gainsbourg:

87.Who sank the Titanic?Iceberg, another Jew.

- The press world:

88.Blindness: point of view.(Michel Laclos)

89.Consolation of Cul-de-Jatte: I will not leave in front.(Robert Lassus)

90.It is better to be cuckold than widower: there are fewer formalities!(Alphonse Allais)

91.The fear of falling: this is what makes the hanged grimacle.(Pierre Dumayet)

92.She fell.He plunged.Missing.(Félix Fénéon)

93.When my father beat me a lot, it's hot.So I hang out towards the window and firm it so that it does not catch air flow.(Jules Vallès)

94.Tragic ball in Colombey-les-Deux-Églises: assessment of a death.(Hara Kiri magazine)

- The world of French literature:

95.The word infarction is the only irregular word in the French language.We say: a infarction, funeral.(Francis Blanche)

96.The post-conflicts are made to bury the missing and find some beautiful sentences.(Francis Blanche)

97.To live happy and always similar to herself, a pretty woman must perish young, and an honest woman disappear aged.(Joseph Joubert)

98.You should never slap a deaf.He loses half of the pleasure.He feels the slap but he does not hear it.(Georges Courteline)

99.The tree, which we make the coffins, is a tree always green.(Xavier forneret)

- an American example:

100 - There are only fools and missing who do not change their opinion.(from the American poet James Russell Lowell)

The word laughter in English "Laugh".Credit: Unsplash

Black humor, endless stories

As you have just seen with this new top 100, the jokes imprints of a dose of "Dark Humor" yellow laughing are infinitely.You are free to modify them and adapt them according to your audience.In some cases, a text made up of a story of black humor can sometimes be accompanied by an image as is the case with satirical newspapers like Hara Kiri.

For those who are looking for other examples of this kind of jokes that can be funny provided you take them in the second degree, you can know that there are certain books available in bookstores and on the Internet.The Amazon site offers, for example, "Le Petit Book de l'humor Noir" by François Jouffa and Frédéric Pouhier at a price of € 17 or "The best of the worst black humor" by Laurent Gaulet at the price of 5.52 €.

If black humor is a too trashy register for you, you can always find our different articles on Toto's jokes, Carambar jokes, or even draw a joke from Tonton in the article devoted to him.And you, what kind of humor do you prefer?